Starring Andy Griffith...
With Ronnie Howard.
Also starring Don knotts.
♪ Nita
♪ juanita
♪ la da Dee Dee Dee
♪ nita
♪ juanita
♪ da da Dee da da
♪ nita
uh, hey
yeah?
Are they the new wanted flyers
that come in from Raleigh?
Yeah.
♪ Nita
uh, Barn?
Anything interesting in 'em,
like, maybe, a suspect we might find in the area?
No.
♪ Nita
♪ Dee Dee Dee da da da da
Lunch, everybody!
Oh, hi, aunt bee!
Hi, boys... Oh, I hope it's good!
Oh, it'll be fine.
I'll get washed up.
Aunt bee, Barney's been singing again.
I don't know how he does it
but he's got a knack of hittin' a note
just enough off to make your skin crawl.
Oh, Andy, everybody can't sing.
You've got to be tolerant of him.
♪ Nita, juanita
♪ ah-dah-dah-Dee dah-da-da-da ♪
Have a sandwich, Barney.
Yeah, fill up your mouth there, Barn.
Eat slow.
Eat a whole lot and eat real slow.
All right.
Well, howdy, John.
Hello, John.
Hello, bee.
Well, what's the trouble?
Andy, I've got to talk to you.
Well, won't you have a sandwich?
No. No, thank you.
Andy, we've got a big problem with the choir.
We have?
Ralph pritchard is dropping out.
Oh, no. No, he's not.
Yes, sir... With his new job of his,
he's on the road two weeks out of three
so he has to step out.
What in the world are we going to do about a first tenor?
I just don't know, Andy.
What about Fred Mason?
Works nights, can't ever make practice.
And with that concert coming up
we need plenty of practice.
We sure do that.
How about Rick Jackson?
Maybe he's a tenor now that he's had his tonsils and...
No. No?
He's got that foghorn voice
even with his passages cleared out.
Ordinarily, it wouldn't be so bad.
I mean, we could get by
but you know the judges of the state contest will be there.
That's right.
Yes, they will... and if we don't make a good showing
for them, we won't even be considered
for the finals at roanoke.
After us working so hard all year.
Yeah, it's tough, all right.
As my old voice teacher used to say
a choir without its tenor
is like a star without its glimmer.
You know who used to say that?
My old voice teacher.
That's the teacher I had when I studied voice.
Barney, you have a trained voice?
I didn't know you studied singing.
Oh, well, just a little.
Uh, John...
Andy, this could solve everything for us!
Barney, what part did you sing?
Oh, first tenor.
Oh, tenor. John...
Well, Barney, how about you joining the choir?
Me?
Sure! With all your training
you're just what we've been looking for.
Well, gosh... gee...
Golly, I never gave that much thought.
Did you, Andy?
No, I sure never did.
You need a tenor, huh?
Oh, with that concert coming up
in less than two weeks, we're desperate.
Oh, well... I guess I wouldn't be
a very civic-minded citizen if I refused, would I?
You can count on old Barn, John.
I'll step in and help you out... When's practice?
Practice is tonight at the town hall.
And you can come right along with Andy.
Right, sheriff?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I'll bring him.
Barney, that's just wonderful.
Isn't that just wonderful, bee?
Yes.
Barney, speaking for the whole choir, welcome aboard.
Well, thank you, John.
Wait till Thelma Lou hears about this.
She'll be thrilled.
Barney's going to be in the choir
that's right.
But Barney can't sing.
I know.
He's a warm, wonderful person
and I love him dearly, but he can't sing.
That's true.
He's kind, considerate
the most gentle person I've ever known
but he can't sing.
You're right.
He's the man I want to marry,
the man I want to be the father of my children...
But he can't sing.
Not a lick.
Well, I'm afraid he's gonna sing
and there's nothing we can do about it.
John masters already welcomed him aboard.
What's going to happen at choir practice tonight?
Well, I expect everybody will find out Barney can't sing.
Not a lick.
Please turn to number 14-a for our first selection.
Ready
: ♪ Welcome, sweet springtime
♪ we greet thee in song...
Oh, oh... shh.
Folks, I think I detected a little flat note there.
Well, perhaps I'm mistaken.
But let's just try it again, shall we?
Hazel...
♪ welcome, sweet springtime
♪ we greet thee in song...
No, no, no, no.
Shh. Folks...
I definitely heard it this time.
Someone is definitely singing off-key.
Now, let's just watch it, shall we?
Hazel...
: Excuse me.
What?
Maybe I can help you out.
I'll sort of move around, see if I can spot who it is.
Very good, Barney.
Hazel...
♪ welcome, sweet springtime
♪ we greet thee in song
♪ murmurs of gladness
♪ fall on the ear
♪ voices long hushed now their full notes prolong ♪
♪ Echoing far and near...
I think you cut out a little too soon.
I didn't have a chance to spot who it was.
Keep it going.
You sure he didn't follow you?
Oh, no.
After he took me home, I waited till he drove off
and then just to make sure, I slipped out the back way.
Good.
Well, Thelma Lou, I guess you know
why I called this emergency meeting.
I'm going to tell Barney Fife to get out of the choir.
Now, John, you can't kick him out
the very day you asked him to join.
I've got to, Andy, or he'll ruin the choir.
Well, there's bound to be another way.
Uh, Thelma Lou, you're his girl...
Oh, no, I-I couldn't.
Aunt bee, he likes you.
Well, why me?
Andy, you're his friend.
Oh, no. No, no, no, no.
Then I'll tell him.
No. You can't do that, John.
Well, what do you suggest?
Maybe he'll fall down and break his mouth.
Hi, John.
Hi. Come on in.
How are you?
Hi, gang.
Hi.
Boy, you sure did wait till the last minute
to change the meeting place. How come?
We figured we had to have one practice without Barney
so's we get an idea of where we're going.
The poor boy.
He'll be expecting us all over at town hall.
That's the truth.
Well, I had to do something.
Do you realize that concert is a week from tonight
and we haven't sung one number through on key.
Well, of course, there's always the alternative.
I could tell him to his face.
No... Oh, no.
Don't do that. We'll do it.
Then let's begin, shall we?
Bee...
Thelma Lou...
Andy...
Thank you.
All right now.
Now, everybody... 14-a, from the beginning.
Everybody ready?
Now a nice group, please... Nice group.
Ready?
Hazel...
♪ welcome, sweet springtime
♪ we greet thee in song
♪ murmurs of gladness fall on the ear ♪
♪ Voices long hushed
♪ now their full notes prolong... ♪
Hi, John.
Hi, everybody.
Hi, Barn.
Gee, you changed the meetin' place, huh?
Golly, it's a lucky thing
I turned down elm street and heard the singing.
Next time you change the meeting place
you ought to let a fella know.
Who's the phone committee?
Oh, uh, didn't anybody call you, Barn?
No, they didn't.
I'm sorry, Barney.
I don't know how that oversight came about.
Well, no harm done.
All's well that ends well.
Here I am.
Let's get started.
Oh, good old 14-a.
♪ Me-me-me-me
♪ me-me-me-me, aaah...
Okay.
Hazel...
♪ welcome, sweet springtime
♪ we greet thee in song
♪ murmurs of gladness...
I'm sorry, Andy, but my mind is made up.
This cannot go on.
The concert is day after tomorrow
and I will not have it ruined
by that caterwauling tenor.
Well?
What's it to be?
You or me?
All right, John, if it's got to be done
I guess it's our place to do it.
Thelma Lou, you and Barney
come on over to the house tonight
and we'll try to think of some way
to keep him from showing up
at that concert.
Well, all right, but how?
Well, after supper, we'll, we'll take him in
and set him down, and talk to him...
Reason with him, explain it all to him...
Then we'll tie him up and put him in the closet.
Yeah, that was really, really good to eat, yeah.
I believe I'll have some more of that coffee.
Uh, hey, Barn?
Huh?
There's, uh...
There's something
we've been wanting to talk with you about.
Something we've been thinking about the choir.
And I bet I know just what it is.
The way we been singing good old 14-a
leaves a lot to be desired.
Listen, while we're all here
why don't we just get in a little extra practice?
Well, that's...
Well, it wouldn't hurt none, you know?
I mean, no matter how good we are
there's always room for improvement.
None of us is perfect.
Come on, Thelma Lou
you can tickle the old ivories.
Set right down here now.
One thing about singing, you never get too much practice.
That's what my voice teacher used to say.
Here it is.
All right, come on. Come on, come on!
That's the place, I believe.
All right.
♪ Me...Me...Me.
Okay, everybody ready?
All right.
: ♪ Welcome, sweet springtime
♪ we greet thee in song
somebody sounds terrible.
♪ Murmurs of gladness fall on the ear ♪
It's Barney!
♪ Voices long hushed now their full notes prolong ♪
Hey, hold it. Hold it!
Did somebody hit a sour note?
Worse than that. Open up your mouth.
Huh?
Open your mouth.
I want to see something.
Ah... Ah...
Oh-oh.
Oh
Aunt bee
you and Thelma Lou look, see if you see it.
Open up. Ah.
Oh, it's all red!
It's red as can be.
It is?
Yes. And swelled up.
Oh, there's a lump in there that big.
Well, Andy, I don't feel sick.
I mean, not very.
It's likely it just started.
You'll be feeling it in a few hours.
I think you better get to bed.
Get to bed?! For how long?
I mean, there's the concert and everything!
Oh, well, you'll have to forget about that.
Huh not be in it?
Leave you without a first tenor?
Well, it'll be a blow to the group.
Blow to the group, there's no doubt about that
but, well, it can't be helped.
But, Andy, I think I can make it.
Barney, you have to think of the others.
I mean, their health... Their health.
You have to think of their health.
Even if you could make it
you wouldn't want to spread your germs
all over everybody else, would you?
Honey, I'll take you home.
Now go along with her, Barney.
And don't you think about the concert.
You just think about getting well.
But to be this close...
Rest, Barney, rest.
Who could that be at this hour?
I don't know.
I reckon I better see, hadn't I?
Barney, what are you doing here?
Andy, I got great news!
My throat ain't sore after all.
How'd you find out?
He insisted on stopping by doc kravits.
This was important.
I didn't want to let the group down.
I figured maybe he could give me
one of them miracle drugs or something.
You know what the miracle was?
There ain't nothing wrong with my throat.
My throat ain't no different than anybody else's.
That's what the doc said.
Good old doc.
You know that lump you seen?
That's the uvula.
Everybody's got one.
Did you know you had a uvula, Andy?
Open your mouth. Go on, open it!
There's the old uvula.
See, you got a uvula.
They got a uvula.
I got a uvula.
All god's children got a uvula.
Hallelujah.
It's just incredible
how a man can sing so flat and talk so normal.
Yup.
Shame Barney can't talk his part.
Yeah.
Hi, everybody.
Gee, I'm sorry I'm late.
Hope I didn't hold you up.
Why, no, Barn.
Matter of fact, we was just discussing
a new idea that involves you.
Oh, yeah? Something to do with the group?
You better know it has.
Uh, we're going to make you soloist.
Right, John?
Soloist? Yeah.
Soloist
yeah, and you're going to have
your own microphone and everything!
I am? Oh, yeah.
We have to keep you
way separate from the group.
You do?
Yeah. That's so
your recitations will stand out.
My recitations?
Yeah. There's going to be one in every number.
And you're going to do 'em.
You mean I don't get to sing?
I just talk?
Oh, it will be so effective.
Won't it?
Effective!
Right in the middle of all this singing
will come your dramatic voice...
Speaking your part.
Won't that be effective?
Well, if you're all agreed
I guess the least I can do
is give her a try.
Oh, good, good.
You stand over here kind of by yourself
and we'll do 14-a.
And when we get to the second verse
you talk it, right?
Okay, good old 14
let's start at "voices long hushed."
All right, Andy.
Now, talk.
Hazel.
♪ Voices long hushed now their full notes prolong ♪
♪ Echoing far and near
"balmy and life-breathing breezes are blowing.
Swiftly to nature, new vigor bestowing."
♪ oh, how my heart
♪ beats with rapture anew
hold it!
You're supposed to be talking.
Oh, it's no use, Andy.
Can you tell a bird to talk?
Can you tell a bird
to just go chirp, chirp, chirp?
No, Andy, I'm like a bird.
I was born to sing.
Barney, Barney, Barney.
If you'll excuse me
I got some throat spray in the car.
If I'm doing solos
I better give myself a couple squirts.
You still want to go through with it?
Let him sing solo?
No, Andy, no.
Wait a minute, John.
It'll work.
It come to me yesterday
when I saw Barney listening to a phonograph record.
Now, listen.
Barney'll do the solos all right.
But it won't be with his voice.
You see, Barney, he'll be on stage
singing into a dead microphone.
The live microphone will be backstage
with Glen cripe singing into it.
It's as simple as that.
But Glen cripe is not a tenor.
It'll work, John.
How are you going to keep Barney quiet?
Even though his microphone is dead
people can still hear him.
I already got that worked out.
Just leave it to me
and don't worry.
This here is a solo microphone.
Very, very, sensitive.
This thing will amplify your voice a thousand times.
Really strong, huh?
Strong
you blast away at this thing
and you'll bust every eardrum
in the auditorium.
What do I do?
You have to sing real low, real low.
Now try it.
Okay.
♪ Balmy and life...
Hold it. Hold it.
Too loud. Low.
♪ Balmy and life...
That's still too loud, Barney.
When I mean low, I mean real low.
It don't take much to be heard.
Try it again.
Try it again, okay.
♪ Balmy and life-breathing breezes are blowing ♪
Was that all right?
That's still too loud, Barney.
Still way yonder too loud.
Believe me, now
tomorrow night, when this microphone's hot
and the amplifiers are amplifying
and the acoustics and all...
Why, I tell you what.
You just keep singing softer and softer
and when you got it about right
I'll tell you.
Okay.
♪ Balmy and life...
♪ balmy and life...
♪ balmy and...
That's it!
That's it! You got it!
Now you do it just like that
and you'll come through fine.
Andy, I was barely making a sound.
You think you was barely making a sound
but tomorrow night
when this microphone's on and you sing like that
your glorious voice
will reverberate all through this hall.
Won't it, gang?
♪ Welcome, sweet springtime, we greet thee in song ♪
♪ Murmurs of gladness fall on the ear ♪
♪ Voices long hushed, now their full notes prolong ♪
♪ Echoing far and near
♪ ooh
♪ sunshine now wakes all the flowers from sleep ♪
♪ Joy-giving incense floats on the air ♪
♪ Snowdrops and primrose both timidly peep ♪
♪ Paling the glad new year
: ♪ balmy and life-breathing breezes are blowing ♪
♪ Swiftly to nature, new vigor bestowing ♪
♪ Oh, how my heart beats with rapture anew ♪
♪ Earth's fairest beauty again meets my view ♪
♪ Sunshine now wakes all the flowers from sleep ♪
♪ Joy-giving incense floats on the air ♪
♪ Snowdrops and primrose both timidly peep ♪
♪ Paling the glad new year
♪ new year ♪
You know, Andy...
I just can't get over
that strange feeling I had last night...
When I heard my little voice
coming over the loudspeaker back at me, I...
Well, it just didn't sound like me.
That's common. It is?
Sure! Ever hear yourself on telephone?
You wouldn't hardly believe it's you.
Yeah, yeah, that's right.
Well, it sure was a lucky day all around
when they asked me to join that choir.
I sure am going to enjoy singing with them
down through the years.
Oh, uh, about that, Barney, uh...
I'm afraid that won't be possible.
Huh?
Well, you know that award they give you
for being the outstanding performer?
You mean, the $10 merchandise certificate?
Yeah... you know what that means, don't you?
That means you are a professional singer.
What?
That's right, that's right.
They give you remuneration for your talent,
and that makes you a professional singer,
and you are no longer eligible to sing with the amateur ranks.
Not sing with the choir? Ever
well, you wouldn't want the mayberry choir to be
disqualified from state competition, would you?
Well, no! But...
Well, then...
Oh, gee, Andy, this comes as disappointing news.
In one way.
Course, in another way, it could be a blessing in disguise.
I mean, if the deputy sheriff business
ever falters, I've got an ace in the hole.
You know, I could move right over into the showbusiness.
You know, singing at weddings and funerals.
Oh, absolutely, yeah.
Of course, in case that ever happens,
I better keep the old voice in shape!
♪ Nita
♪ juanita
♪ da da da da da da da ♪